Tuesday, September 7, 2010


Can't afford to go to Uman? Don't like to fly? Wish you had a rebbe to visit in a cemetery in the U.S.? Tired of letting all that money go to some European country whose residents would have been happy to give you up to the Nazis?
The Solution Is Right Here in Your Neighborhood!!

Tickets now being sold to camp out on neighboring properties to spend Rosh Hashana at the Brick Church Cemetery, right here in New Hempstead/Monsey! There are so many advantages to staying at a local graveyard this Rosh Hashana:

There are different neighborhoods and different rabbanim buried here. Choose your grave from across the religious spectrum!

There is a lot of lighting from local homes. We have good street lights here in America.

No need to deal with foreign currency. If you need a pre-yom tov slice of kugel, run down to Meal Mart and pull out the ole' George Washington.

Why deal with catered or institutionalized food, when the wife can run over with warm homemade food you're accustomed to? Don't compromise on the meals you are used to getting every other Yom Tov! and Shabbos! Let your wife know how much you value her cooking and how important Yom Tov meals are to you! It's about the sanctity of the chag.

Your family can visit you Yom Tov Afternoon.

If you don't want to see your family, you can hide in the *other* cemetery nearby. The revolutionary war soldiers were great marksmen. America protects its own.

Local heimishe families are gracious to locals and needy Jews who pass by. They know the value of proper indoor plumbing.

Staying local affords you the opportunity to still attend your regular shiurim. You might appreciate a good snooze in an air conditioned building, too.

You might get some other passersby to join you in the davening.

Most of all, staying local shows your family how important it is to you to make sure you are around them for the chag. Special areas will be set aside for fathers to hear their children's divrei Torah!!

Shana Tova!!

1 comment:

G6 said...

I want to reserve a front seat on the couch by the window.
I can just picture it....

K'siva V'chasima Tova.